From a King to a Pimp

We were asked to blog about this passage, seeing that my previous blog was on a similar subject I decided to do some translation to the lowest form of speech. If I remember correctly we were asked early on in the semester to do a translation, if not, oh well, here is some strange stuff.

 From a King to a Pimp.
Oh, reason not the need! Our basset beggars
Are in the porrest thing superfluous.
Allow not nature more than nature needs, 
Man's life is cheap as beast's. Thou art a lady;
If only to go warm were gorgeous, 
Why, nature deeds not what thou gorgeous wear'st,
Which scarcely keeps the warm. But,. for true need--
You heavens, give me that patience; patience I need!
You see me here, you gods, a poor old man, 
As full of grief as age, wretched in both.
If it be you that stirs these daughters' hearts 
Against their father, fool me not so much
To bear it tamely; touch me with noble anger,
And let not women's wopons, water drops, 
Stain my man's cheeks. No, you unnatural hags,
I will have such revenges on you both
That all the world shall--I will do such things--
What they are yet I know not, but they shall be 
The terrors of the earth. You think I'll weep.
No, I'll not weep.
I have full cause of weeping; but this heart
Shall break into a hundred thousand flaws
Or ere I'll weep. Oh, Fool, I shall go mad! 

Shit, don't tell me about need.
Some of them hobos be havin'
Shit that they don't need.
You best stop thinkin' about all that
Worthless shit you don't be needen
And spy on that mangy mutt that
Makes it just fine wit nuttin but nuttin.
Why you be wearin' those damn uncomfortable
heels, you best get some sneakers, them be practicle.
God, give me the time, man I need time!
God you see me, beat down, no money havin'
As old as I am pissed off.
If it be you God that make these bitches
Go against their Daddy, Stop playin'
Don't let them bitches tears keep me from my money
I ain't cryin' You old ass street walkers,
You gonna see the wrath I be bringin' on you.
Everebody be knowin' what I be doin'
Shit, I don't know what I be doin' yet
But it gonna be some ruthless shit, hear me.
You think it hurt me,
It ain't hurtin' me none
Man I should be hurt like a mathafaka
But no, rip my heart outta ma chest
before you see me a hurtin
Damn fool, shit makin' me crazy!